Every year when summer finally reaches it's head, I stay up late trying to complete a million-and-one things that go hand-in-hand with my new year, new me approach and regret come first day of school when I'm droopy eyed, in a stiff school skirt, confronted by all the same school bullshit and the relief of routine and pattern after a messy, messy summer vacation.
And I don't think about that regret or that I'll have choice words for my brother when he uses up all the hot water because my head's swimming with inside jokes and the colour blue and My So-Called Life's Angela performing a voice-over as I start up an impromptu art project saying, "There's something about Sunday night that makes you want to kill yourself... and that creepy 60 Minutes watch that sounds like your whole life." And that ticking away of your youth, your memories, your 'why didn't I journal this, will it even be real now' is all the more intensified because you're not just looking at a two day weekend and a Monday but it's over thirty days of everyday-is-so-promising-and-beautiful-it's-like-Saturday-on-'roids and now a sea of Mondays where you'll barely remember the time you woke up at 4am by choice to go watch the sunrise or how good your pillows felt after a long trip away.
I've been working on my Photoshop and illustrations and made the above one after stills from Kilo Kish's Locket music video. It's weird how the drawing and the music video seem to capture all my foggy feelings about the end of a not bummer summer and my final year of high school.